Career Tips Over Coffee:  Release, Don't Ruminate

Blog Post created by susan.hodge Champion on May 18, 2015

Last week Katie shared in one of the PinkPetro discussions that someone had hit her blog with an inappropriate comment.  I feel for her because

I’ve had similar experiences.  You can’t be visible in business without someone taking pot shots at you.


Whether it’s perfectionism, taking things personally or a  confidence drain (all of which can show up with women) when someone makes a
derisive comment about us or our work, it can hit hard.  We react differently than most men do.  We hang on to it, worry and ruminate.



Rewire your thoughts:  In The Confidence Code by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman, the authors give this tip:
When you find yourself dwelling on a negative situation, turn it around  and find something good about the experience. It trains your brain to react
differently to negative experiences.


Remind yourself that what you are worrying about, others have long forgotten.  I was speaking with a woman last week who was
concerned she had made a mistake in a meeting and that she was going to have to do some serious career development to overcome it.

When I probed, I found it was a pretty simple mistake and it happened two months ago. Based on the circumstances,  I’m pretty sure everyone else

had forgotten it by now, yet she was still ruminating on it.   We’re more critical of ourselves than most others are.


Criticism can be a sign you’re doing something great.  If someone is trying to bring you down, it’s often because you’re doing something
right and they are feeling jealous or threatened.  Let it go.